Anger Management and Anger Control
This article is part of a series that will help you get a better understanding of anger management.
Anger Control
Anger is normal human emotion. It is healthy when controlled. Human beings seldom act physically when expressing their anger. We have language hence we use verbal abusing and this is only followed by physical rage if anger is not controlled. When this happens, It can lead problems with family members and at the work place.
Anger is an emotion accompanied by physiological and biological changes. Your heart rate and blood pressure go up when you are angry. In addition your energy hormones, adrenaline and noradrenaline, both increase.
A person could be angry at a specific person or event or anger may be caused by worrying about the personal problems. Memories or upsetting events can cause angry feelings. Naturally anger is explicitly aggressive. So there are fights and hence we defend ourselves if we are attacked. We can not physically attack every person or object that irritates us or annoys us. The norms of every day behaviour expected by society should be followed.
There are three main approaches to anger control - expressing anger, suppressing anger and calming or controlling anger. When you can express your feelings in controlled fashion but in a self-assertive personal manner then that it is the healthiest way. It is not easy to do this. You need to know your needs, and how to get them met, without hurting others. This needs to be done in a way that is both respectful to yourself and to others.
When anger is suppressed, it is not allowed outward expression and it can turn in on you. It may cause hypertension, high blood pressure or depression. If anger is not expressed it can create other problems. It creates either an insincere oran aggressive demeanour which prevents you building successful relations with others. Ultimately if you can cool off inside, your internal responses will respond by reducing your heart rate and your blood pressure and hence your outward behaviour will be controlled. If these techniques are not successful then people or things are going to get hurt or damaged. Anger can be controlled by simple techniques. Relaxation tools such as deep breathing can help calm down wild feelings. Breathing deeply and repeating soothing phrases like "take it easy" in your mind will enable you to reduce your internal angry feelings. Practice this technique daily. Slow yoga and meditation is another way to relax.
The other way is to change the way you think. People lacking self control sometimes curse, swear or speak in extremely colourful terms. When we are angry our manner is aggressive and extra dramatic. If we superimpose more moderate thoughts it will help us. You have to remind yourself that getting angry is not going to solve anything. That makes you feel worse. We try to find out a solution for our problems but sometimes that is not possible. Hence we get angry. As an alternative to that we have to learn to face the problem. When we are furious we come to conclusions which are often wrong. If we slow down and think carefully about what we want to say before answering others it will help to solve the problems.
Remember, it can take time to learn to control your anger: -
"Success will never be a big step in the future, success is a small step taken just now. "~Jonatan Mårtensson
I hope this article provided you with the information and understanding you were looking for.
Brian Waybridge, the author of this article, learnt how to come to terms with his own anger and now enjoys positive relationships with his family, friends and colleagues.